A few years ago, when the markets crashed, I remember thinking that as a collective we were redefining what was important to us. I saw some beautiful shifts in the lives of many and a shift for the planet. (Not to diminish the hardships I also saw).
Since that time I’ve seen people simplify. I’ve also seen people define the things that have brought them safety and security. I’ve seen them say to themselves and others: “As long as I’ve got this crazy old house we’re good”, “this neighborhood has been my rock”, “as long as I’ve got my husband …”, “My kids are everything” … “thank goodness our business is flourishing” “thankfully my office has been growing during the recession” and the list goes on.
What I’m finding in my own life and in the lives of those around me is that the one thing that has helped us feel safe, secure, OK … is being challenged. Some in big and obvious ways and some in more subtle ways.
In my own life, I’ve joked for probably 10 or more years that I don’t really care what goes on in the world. “Even if Wayne and I end up living in a shack on a beach in Mexico home schooling our kids, we’ll be fine.” (And that statement represented a lot of security to me).
This past summer things shifted. Not in a bad way. I’ve gone from feeling like Wayne is my guy, my person I’ll never lose, my person I never want to lose, my security … to feeling more secure in and of myself. That no matter what happens in the world I’ll be OK. My security has come from my connection to the earth and to spirit. From this place I’ve been deeply grateful for him and enjoying his company. It’s no longer me and him (and our kids) against the world. There is no “against” any longer. And there is no real security outside of me.
It’s been more unsettling than I’m portraying as I write this – and I think it’s taking us and our relationship somewhere really nice. I’ve seen similar shifts both comfortable and uncomfortable in those around me as well.
I think there was a time in our lives where if we held something in an “unhealthy” way – we might need to lose it to learn a different way. I don’t think that’s where we are in time any longer. I think this is the time for the perceptual shifts – in changing how we hold things – rather than changing what we hold.
And you may find both showing up in your life.
I want to challenge you to take an honest look at your own life. What are you holding on to tightly? What are you taking for granted? Where does your security and safety really lie? This week take one step to shift that safety to live within you. And see what shows up in your life.